Dear Jennifer
I suppose that you find yourself getting shy, and afraid that you will be thought of as weird, or too pushy, or some other negative adjective.
Look at it this way. By breaking the ice, you are doing your friend a favor, honey!
They probably want to talk to you about the same things you want to talk to them about. Both of you are most likely shy and afraid of rejection.
So, the best way to do that is to ask your friend if you can send her a story that you enjoyed reading by email. Pick a story about two friends that kiss. Email it to her. And, at the end of the story, type her the question, “What do you think?”
Let her respond to you. If her response is negative, just consider it as her being honest with you. And if it is not one of her turn-ons, let it be. You have just eliminated her as one of your potential lovers.
In fact, you could send this same email to all your friends that turn you on honey! And then wait for the responses to come in.
This is called “Breaking the Ice” with your intended lovers. You will often be nicely surprised by the results of breaking the ice.
Regarding your comment that you “talk to them like they are your best friends”, that is a GOOD thing honey! You SHOULD know your lover well before you have sex.
See, sex is a normal part of life. It is natural, ingrained, normal, and not a bad thing in any way. God designed sex to be the glue that binds two lovers together. Don’t be ashamed of your feelings honey. Never be ashamed of your feelings unless they are intended to hurt another person.
If you think sex is a bad thing, then you are naturally afraid to talk about it. It is important to recognize and convince yourself that sex is NOT bad. And if one of your friends is offended that you asked her if she was interested in you, then that person is probably too inhibited to be a good and nourishing lover any way. Better to find that out earlier, rather than later. You have just eliminated one potentially bad relationship! Fewer heart breaks is a good thing honey.
I wish you the best in your blossoming sexuality, Jennifer.
Thanks for writing!
Deni | Samarel Sex Advice Editor
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